Wednesday, July 16, 2014

Funny Florida Laws

-It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit.
-Men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless                -Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal.
-It is illegal to skateboard without a license.
-When having sex, only the missionary position is legal.
-You may not fart in a public place after 6 PM on Thursday.  Save your nocturnal farts for the other six days.
-It is considered an offense to shower naked.
-You are not allowed to break more than three dishes per day, or chip the edges of more than four cups and/or saucers.
-You may not kiss your wife's breasts.
-Penalty for horse theft is death by hanging.

-The state constitution allows for freedom of speech, a trial by jury, and pregnant pigs to not be confined in cages.
-One may not commit any "unnatural acts" with another person.
-Unmarried couples may not commit "lewd acts" and live together in the same residence.
-Corrupting the public morals is defined as a nuisance, and is declared a misdemeanor offense.
-Doors of all public buildings must open outwards.
-It is illegal to sell your children.
-Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon owner.
-A special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday or she shall risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing.
-If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle.

In Pensacola citizens may not be caught downtown without at least 10 dollars on their person.

In Key West, chickens are considered a 'protected species.'


  1. It's true, chickens do run at large in Key West.

    Was there a horse thief named Chad who was hanged in 2000?

  2. I want to see the list of lewd acts. It could be a 'to do' list.

    Duck - I remember when Chad was hung. Then he had that operation.

  3. ....and to think I had the naïve idea that 'anything goes' in florida

  4. "It is considered an offense to shower naked." I've seen some of the people who live in Florida (present company excepted, Kathy). It should be considered an offense to do *anything* naked.

  5. I think there might be a nude beach somewhere in the area. Really? Thanks for your listing. I'll stay in Texas