I changed my iPod name to Titanic. It's syncing now.
When chemists die,
Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any
How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.
I stayed up all
night to see where the sun went. Than it dawned on me.
This girl said she
recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.
reading a book about anti-gravity. I can't put it down.
I did a
theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.
They told me I
had type A blood , but it was a type-O.
A dyslexic man walks into a
PMS jokes aren't funny, period.
Why were the Indians here
first? They had reservations.
Class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope
there's no pop quiz.
Energizer bunny arrested. Charged with
I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.
do you make holy water? Boil the hell out of it!
Did you hear about the
cross eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn't control her
When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.
a clock do when it's hungry? It goes back four seconds.
I wondered why
the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me!
Broken pencils are
I tried to catch some fog. I mist.
What do you call a
dinosaur with a extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
England has no kidney
bank, but it does have a Liverpool.
I used to be a banker, but then I
I dropped out of communism class because of lousy
All the toilets in New York 's police stations have been stolen.
Police have nothing to go on.
I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded
Haunted French pancakes give me the crepes.
Velcro - what a
Cartoonist found dead in home. Details are
Venison for dinner? Oh deer!
Earthquake in Washington is
obviously government's fault.
I used to think I was indecisive, but now
I'm not so sure.
Be kind to your dentist. He has fillings,
Never fall in love with a tennis player because, to a tennis player,
love means nothing.